Challenge to be Me
Summary: Self improvement ain't all it's cracked up to be.
I'm lifting weights and Jim is spotting me. I have no issues with physical fitness in general, but this isn't usually my cup of tea. Supposedly, it's to strengthen my arms and wrists for the shooting range, but I'm really here because it's fun working out with the human monolith also known as Jim Ellison.
Yeah, Jim can be a fun guy, and quit giving me that look! He's a lot of fun. We have loads of fun going fishing and playing basketball and we're not too bad at a few indoor sports too. Like poker. Boy, do you have a dirty mind! Not that I blame you, I mean, look at the guy. Greek statues drool when they see him.
Not that I'm a ninety pound weakling or anything. I can wield a stick or a vending machine with the best of them. Just a hair under average, I made the Academy's height requirement with an inch to spare, thank you very much. I don't mind being a bit on the short side, it's an interesting perspective on life, and besides, my favorite positions don't require a height advantage to be fun.
That being said, I'm the sort that prefers to live by my wits. I mean, the last time a girl asked me to do that macho thing and open a pickle jar, the jar won, and sat there and laughed at me for being such a weinie. So, watch out, future pickle jars, Blair Sandburg is pumping up. Laugh while you still can.
And most importantly, I'm laying here and there's two hundred pounds of sculpted hunky cop hovering over me. God, I'm a lucky guy. What a view.
Jim tells me I'm "shaping up nicely" which gives me this little twinge of insecurity. I mean, I know I'm cute. I've resigned myself to cuteness. It could be worse, I suppose. Of course, I was sort of hoping for "drop dead handsome and godlike sex on two legs" but cute is good. I can live with cute. We do our "Hans and Franz" impression and Jim is laughing as we go hit the shower.
Whoa, I'm having a "what does he see in me?" freak out here, just ignore me while I get all verklempt for a moment. Talk among yourselves. Okay, it's over. Well, until next time.
Intellectually, I'm aware of my contributions to this partnership. For one thing, I'm cute, I think I said that. And I'm sort of the brains of this outfit, although Jim is no slacker in the I.Q. department himself, believe me. He's got a hell of a memory and he's a strategic thinking machine.
Yeah, I only fell in love with him for his brains. Ha ha. Well, as I was saying, I'm sort of the brains of this outfit, but only by virtue of being an outside the box sort of thinker, because boy howdy, is Jim outside of the box.
Well, gotta hit the shower, and boy are my arms sore. I'm going to need some magic Sentinel fingers tonight, I can tell you that. Scratch that brains thing, I only fell in love with him for his ten magic fingers. Speaking of fingers…
"Chief, did you just pinch my ass?"
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